Operation 365... Blog 348

NOTE: An abridged version of this blog has been posted to youtube.com/jeffersonjaydotcom. This is the the unabridged version.

Operation 365 - Jefferson Jay - Archives - 354 Jefferson Jay "Believe It" 12-18-2008
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBCntDpZ0eY


It's been a long week at the home offices of the Operation 365. I am on the fence about how many details I wish to share. I want to be honest. I know honesty makes for a more compelling communication. That said, I don't wish to smear poop all over the end of the 365 for anyone who may be enjoying and looking forward to a nice happy ending. American folks like a happy ending.

We played our CD release. Paul Ruiz almost didn't come. His back hurts. I had to beg him on the phone at the last minute and then the world's most reliable friend, Blowski, went and picked him up. He arrived just as we were about to begin. I was taken aback. Chris Zach's terrific band, For the Faint, brought the large majority of the people. For my part, my friends came out and only two of them stayed til the end of the set. We played to some friends and then to no one. It didn't feel great for that to be the result of my big show of the year. It makes you question some things... Everything.

I've been through disappointing things with shows before. I know to just say nothing and react another day, after cooler heads prevail. No such luck this time. When pay time came, to make a long, disgraceful story short, Richard, told me if I didn't give him and Soul Man (who he apparently speaks for, now) twenty bucks more each, I could find a new bass player. I had paid everyone in the band an even amount. He didn't care. I don't even know if he believed me. He said I was "off by 180 degrees" for paying Chris's band, even thought they brought most of the people. I disagreed.

To me, an ultimatum is no choice at all. Anybody who would put you in a position like that is not really your friend and nobody you should want to be playing music with. It was an easy choice, given the options. Then, after making this scene in front of bartenders, security people and the sound man he said he was going to remove himself from the situation in the interest of being professional. I told him it was too late for that.

Pretty much the whole reason I had Richard and Soul Man in my band was that they were my friends. They both play fine, but Richard is a guitarist naturally, and The Soul Man... well, he is The Soul Man. So as disappointed as I was about the setback for the band, it was the betrayal of my friends that most upset me.

So I guess Richard was not my friend after all. Sadder is that he poisoned the mind of a 93-year old man who I have been friends with for a decade. Soul Man has played in my band for years and told me countless times, he would play with me forever. There are many other unsavory details that make this story even more pathetic than it seems, but that is enough trash for now. You can see how it would be a tough decision whether to share that or not. Trust me, there's a lot more I can say.

I will find a positive. You can't mix your music with people who are negative. It will make your music that way. My friends have opened up to me since this all went down and told me Richard's been talking behind my back for some time. I didn't know. I thought we were friends. It's too bad I misjudged him so greatly.

A lot of shit has been rough lately. I'm not gonna lie. I could go on and on. I'm hanging in there though. As it says in this tune here, "Believe It," everything happens for a reason. I believe that and look forward to finding out with it is this time.

This version of "Believe It" was recorded at a brighter time, December 18, 2008. I am on stage with Senagalese kora virtuoso Amadou Fall and my long-time musical associate The Soul Man. We played "Believe It," a new song at the time. This was the night of Don Truesdail's last performance. I wonder what Don would think now about all this. Probably that I shouldn't write this blog. Who knows?

It doesn't feel true to me to end the 365 pretending everything's AOK. As much as I'd like to portray everything as "smooth sailing," it seems disingenuous. I've worked too long and hard to end the 365, lying.

Oh, with that said, I may as well add, my Open Mic at The Reunion is over. I was gonna leave that detail out of this narrative, but F it. Yeah, the extra 30 to 50 people a week I brought out in my first 2 moths didn't drink enough, and that's what matters to bar owners. I even did last week's show for free because there was this article in the local paper, The Peninsula Beacon and I didn't anyone who read it to come out and find no show. Pretty sad.

http://www.sdnews.com/view/full_story/16279737/article-Jefferson-Jay-launches-new-open-mic-gig-at-Reunion?instance=arts

Richard (and Soul Man) got a gig out of the Open Mic. A friend said he was bragging about how much money he made the time they played. Maybe that is what pushed him to act the way he did Friday night. I can't accept that he acted that way, in public no less, over 20 bucks. No one is that petty. Richard Petty? That sounds familiar...

I still believe the beautiful truth will be prevail. It is still a gift to be alive. I do have some awesome friends and wonderful, loving girlfriend, who is also my drummer. That's a ton and I realize it. She is sick, but its been that kind of week. The slate is close to clean. I am back to the drawing board, 354 days in. Square One.

Do I have any business pursuing a future in music? Not in San Diego, I don't. Not without hiring some serious help on the business side of things. I am going to have to re-evaluate everything and decide what's next for me. I love playing music when it's fun. For the first time lately, it hasn't always been. If I'm gonna spend my life doing that it will have to be elsewhere, most likely. I told myself I need to "Take this show on the road or do something else." The guys I was playing with were pretty much never going to travel anywhere anyway and it's probably for the best, whatever happens. Everything happens for a reason. Today's song says that over and over again. The point is not lost on me.

"Believe It" is on my new CD "Gift To Be Alive." I poured my heart, time, and effort into it. I poured my soul into it. I am offering it to folks for free 'cause I want something to show for all this work. A reaction. I want people to receive the music. I want to make a positive impact on the world. I believe that's why exist as humans. You can have it here if you like.

http://jeffersonjay.bandcamp.com/album/gift-to-be-alive-2

Operation 365 - Jefferson Jay - Covers - 354 "I'm No Stranger to the Rain" by Keith Whitley
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iX8jrWTSDv8


An hour ago, I'd never heard of "I'm No Stranger to the Rain." Yesterday, it was raining here in the SD and I covered CCR's "Have You Ever Seen the Rain?" I posted it on Facebook and my dear friend Janet Truesdail (mom of Don) responded "I'm No Stranger to the Rain." So I looked it up and listened to it here. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UlF2p1UPt8Y

Seemed like a nice enough song. I'm feeling the sentiments. Then I looked up the chords here. The song is nice. I played it.

http://www.cowboylyrics.com/tabs/whitley-keith/im-no-stranger-to-the-rain-721.html

Reminds me of a story about a guy who used to be in my band. He'd been complaining a lot lately. There was the drunken cursing-me-off text messages from two weeks ago about the pay for the CD release party. Mind you, he never asked what the pay was. He was just cursing me off and bitching in texts. Not very friendly or respectful. It went on for like half an hour. He later said he was drunk, my favorite excuse. And you wonder how playing music can be unfun. Sometimes, it's flat out thankless.

So, another day, he refused to play this song, "I'll Take You," because he doesn't "play country shit." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ur2XNNjHEI

He said he feels he's above it. He refused to play 1-5, the most simple, elementary, and effective bass line in all of music, especially country-ish stuff. So I cut the song from the set, just so he wouldn't complain. I was sick of making those types of accommodations, but I did again and again. I never even thought of the tune as a country tune, actually. It is just a song to me. They all are. I look forward to playing what songs I want and dressing how I want in my own band without being told what to do. As a final show of respect for what I thought was our friendship, I am going to erase all the super true, really harsh, how-I-really-feel, cutting stuff this rant in an attempt to salvage whatever bit of the moral high ground I may have left. It was funny though, rest assured.

My dear friend Don Truesdail, used to always emphasize the importance of always keeping the moral high ground. Hopefully, I haven't blown that one too badly. I cut a lot of stuff out, I swear. There's a fine line between honesty and pooping yourself with honesty. Hopefully, Don would think I was at least slightly closer to the former.

I love you Janet. Hope you like the song.

Operation 365 - Jefferson Jay - Outtakes - 354 Believe It and Gift To Be Alive" 3-11-2010
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBQToSmkHVg



I have been trying to pull the best versions of the tunes on the "Gift To Be Alive" CD as a fitting climax to the 365. Yesterday, I was way too down in the dumps to spend too much time doing any of it. So today, I am offering and extra "Gift To Be Alive" version after this additional version of today's tune 'Believe It," just for kicks.

These were recorded on March 11, 2010, at Portugalia. Enjoy.

"Gift To Be Alive" is yours for free or any price you deem appropriate here.

http://jeffersonjay.bandcamp.com/album/gift-to-be-alive-2

I hope you like it.

Operation 365 - Jefferson Jay - Originals - 354 Jefferson Jay "Believe It" 8-19-2009
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUBedMjwzvk


Here is the Jefferson Jay Band as it was on August 19, 2008 at The Belly Up tavern in Solana Beach. "Believe It" is the 3rd song off my new CD, "Gift To Be Alive," which can be heard, had, or held via here.

http://jeffersonjay.bandcamp.com/album/gift-to-be-alive-2

It was a labor of love, and much more. It hope it will mean close to as much to you as it has to me. Thanks.